ablutions all around
sometimes i get melancholy at this time, the time when i need to get up from the computer and leave. i'm not sure why -- maybe it's cause i haven't talked to anybody? well, wait, i have... i got email, i chatted, i even did a very small amount of actual work. what is there to be melancholy about?
even still, i feel like i want more. i want an email from a girl that i like, or a good long conversation with someone smart and funny (hey, tubbs). i guess i want to know that i'm not alone, and to validate my existence somehow.
maybe i just want to go to sleep. but that's the odd thing, because no matter how tired i am (no, this is not a new thing), i still don't want to go to sleep when i feel this way.
i want to be held by loving arms,
i want to fall asleep in your embrace,
i want to smell you sweetly sleep,
i want to wake up to your face.
i'm sure that holly appreciated that. she says i'm a romantic. (no, she and i are not romantic.) that's how rumors get started, i suppose. i should just let them.
so, now i suppose i'm just rambling to pass the time. i'm in a dorm right now, and it's after curfew, and i hope i don't get spotted when i walk right out the door. it hasn't happened yet.
i used to be friends with a girl named collette, and i liked her but she didn't like me. i would write emails to her in this late night state of free-floatingness (hey, amba). she said they mesmerized her, which was good because she had an otherwise short attention span. i wrote them in this very same lab, usually sitting only a very few feet from where i am sitting now. that was early ninety-seven. she was a senior in high school, and i a freshman in college. she's probably graduated college by now; i would have graduated at least a year ago had i gone straight through, even with switching majors.
i haven't seen collette in years.