am snide and meaningless
just won my first ever vegas-style game of windows solitaire. there wasn't really any trick to it, except maybe the willingness to bring cards back down in order to advance. move backwards in order to move forwards. sacrifice to gain.
i had a little epiphany of sorts about these online diary things. it came from my recent attempts at self-photography. it seems that i look different in these photographs than i do in photographs that other people take, presumably because i'm aware of and involved in the photography process, rather than just living my life, doot-de-doo.
is a public diary the same? do i look different here than i would in a privately kept journal? i'm not sure. (for that matter, do i look different here than i would if somebody else were writing about what happened to me? probably. silly question.)
but that's the crux of the matter. i'm not sure how accurate a portrayal of me this journal is; and that applies to everyone else keeping an online diary. how truly are they being represented here?
in the end, it's just a bunch of words. words can mislead, words can confuse. words can paint a pretty picture.
words can ramble.